We all know that guy or girl who always ends up in unhealthy relationships. This person does not just have one unhealthy or toxic relationship but seems to repeat a pattern that frustrates them as well as those around them.
But why do they have this pattern? And can it be broken? Let’s dive deep.
Childhood Trauma and early years of relationship
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Psychological analysis has revealed that whether we intend or not, the way we interact with our caregivers as children is imitated in our early years of relationship.
Several characteristics of our behaviour and the way we interact with others on a daily basis are based on our childhood learnings, precisely the way we learned to interact during our growing years.
If any of these associations were dysfunctional, it may imprint on our ways of engaging with the world as adults and impact our romantic relationships.
Dysfunctional or abusive relationships with caregivers can get firmly rooted in individuals, influencing their perception of socialization and definition of “normal”. This, by all means, gets extended to romantic relationships, leading trauma survivors to engage in and entertain toxicity.
Can we get past the trauma to develop healthy relationships?
Fortunately, trauma can be conquered with a little bit of help. Many have sought professional help, focused on themselves, and got better of their trauma to enter and develop healthy relationships.
Putting past experiences and abusive relationships behind is not easy, but with determination and self-love, one can overcome what holds them back from finding good partners and building healthy relationships.
Of course, no relationship is perfect and there is no “ideal” kind. But recognizing the red flags early on can be a huge help. Remember! This is something you have to conquer by yourself, and while the right partner can work as a catalyst, it is best to heal yourself before seeking the perfect match.
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